Coach Cassandra Rae

One of the things that The Hubs and I talk about a lot is the pressure to be productive at work.  There seems to be this incessant need to prove our value by a myriad of things: projects completed, deadlines met, hours worked, hours billed, jokes told, ideas presented, etc.  And yet, what if I told you that it was this need to prove, this pressure to be productive, that was actually keeping your productivity down?

It’s true.  Because productivity isn’t a product of pressure.  Nope.  It’s a product of intention, which is how you approach a job.  It’s where you’re coming from.  And from what I’ve learned, the lighter you approach a job (i.e. the less pressure), the more you can accomplish.  It’s one of the Universe’s cosmic jokes: when you stop trying to prove your worth, you discover your value.  And it’s not that it wasn’t there all along.  It’s just that you couldn’t see it – or more importantly – you couldn’t feel it.

So if you really want to increase your productivity at work, then stop pressuring yourself and start trusting that how you are is just as important as what you are.

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If this topic speaks to your heart (or your pressure :~), then I invite you to check out this coaching call I’ve got coming up in September. Click here to see the invitation on SimplyFearless.com

Tags: business development, career, pressure, stress, work

This photo is my Weekly Winner today because it’s the only photo I took this week!  I went to the park with my camera and when I turned it on I realized the battery was out of juice.  Bummer. But, it’s still a winner!

“The Next Step is Only One Step”

Even when you can’t see clearly…the next step is still only one step. Of course, you probably wouldn’t want to be walking on the backrest of a park bench unless you were an ant, a ladybug, or a butterfly….but, I still like the perspective that the next step is only one step :~)

So often it’s hard to see directly in front of you. But, if you keep your eye on your greatest vision (why would you hold a vision that was less than the greatest?!), then even if you aren’t exactly sure what to do next – the vision can still come true. In fact, lots of times when you hold fast the reality ends up BETTER than the original idea.

And so it is.

Tags: decisions, goals, photography, success, vision, Weekly Winners

“Letting go of the pressure” from my photo journal dated 06/27/07

You guys, I’m so excited!  Why? you ask. Because I’m in the process of putting together a group call all about:

PRESSURE!

Pressure is by far the biggest barrier that stops people from living their Simply Fearless life and I can’t wait to get this discussion started.  Stay tuned for more information and an invitation.  In the meantime, let go of the pressure! How? you ask. Join the call to find out :~)

Tags: connecting, Life Coaching, pressure, stress, support, teleclasses

“thoughtfulness” by lampelina

Men are heartless.

It’s a total lie. You know it. I know it. And yet, we continue to shun men who express their emotions. We label them as weak or homosexual. What an insult to men and the gay community.

So how do we go about creating an environment where men are accepted as the sentient beings we all are? I’m so glad you asked because I’ve got some great ideas!

First of all, as HGTV says, “start at home.”

Women…ask the men in your home how they are feeling and then stop talking and start listening.  Create a safe, quiet space for your men to open up in.  This doesn’t have to be long and involved.  I’m talking about a few minutes at a time.

Men…describe how you are feeling even if you don’t understand it.  This isn’t about solving a problem.  It’s only about giving words to what’s inside as a way to let it out.  This can be to your beloved, a friend, or even in your journal.  What? You don’t have a journal? Why not? Go out there and treat yourself to a book that’s all about you.

As you can see, I’m not talking about rocket science here.  I’m talking about giving a few minutes of time, energy, and attention to the often overlooked heart of a man.  Try these simple ideas and let me know how it goes. Did any challenges come up for you? Are you struggling to get started? Or do you have more ideas that you’d like to share? I’d love to hear about it.

Simply Fearless ~
Coach Cassandra Rae
Cassandra[at]SimplyFearless.com

Tags: communication, connecting, courage, gender, happiness, heart, men, Relationships

{note about video: it will automatically load and play – to pause scroll over the “menu” and it will pop up}

Holy cow…my favorite Dolores O’Riordan with the Cranberries just released a solo album! AND…get this…she is going on tour with the Cranberries right here in North America beginning this November. I absolutely must go and of course I have to take my daughter with me who is still mad that I took my nephew instead of her to the last one.

In the above video she is quoted as saying, “Certain moments only last for so long and it’s important to live within those moments.” She goes on to talk about why do we rush around and the wisdom of appreciating what’s on our plate right now. She’s f-ing brilliant!

And then she sings a song she wrote for her dad when he was sick (he’s better now!) and of course I immediately thought of my sister who is currently going through some health challenges. I love you, Sis, and this one’s dedicated to you! Watch the above video to listen to “It’s You” by Dolores O’Riordan and check out her on-line store to buy her new album “No Baggage”.

Tags: Cranberries, Dolores O'Riordan, Family, music, sisters

This is one of the best self-discovery books I’ve read and it’s all about “creating the work you love.” She poses this powerful question:

If you’re this successful doing work you don’t love, what could you do with work you do love?

If this question stirs something within you, then I invite you to stop reading this blog post, take out your journal, and write about it.

The really cool thing about this book is that Tama shares so openly about her journey. She tells the truth about the ups and downs of leaving the “comfort” of a socially-praised career in order to follow her heart. I found it inspiring and so helpful even though it wasn’t filled with worksheets for the reader to use. But, it is filled with poetic and wise words. I’ve known for quite some time that when an author has hit a deep understanding of a topic that she can write in a concise and simple way. This is one of those books with an added poetic bonus.

As a life coach, I pick up self-discovery books all the time. In fact, I have a library of ones that I haven’t had a chance to read yet. Lots of times I begin, get distracted, and haven’t returned to them yet. Well, this particular book I bought because Tama was a guest speaker at my spiritual community The Center for Spiritual Living in San Jose and after listening to her message my 16 year old daughter asked me to buy it. That right there says leaps and bounds about the power of this book.

Learn more about Tama Kieves on her website at AwakeningArtistry.com

Tags: Book Reviews, books, cancer, change, courage, fear, inspiration, job, Life Coaching, life purpose, transformation

Lately I’ve been in this gathering mode, which means that I am collecting everything in my house of like-kind and putting them together.  Yesterday I gathered all of my journals and put them on a shelf beside my bed.  And can you believe that I have filled 17 journals from 06/05 through 08/09? I think that’s pretty damn cool.

Upon this realization it occurred to me that the single most powerful thing I have done for myself in my journey of transformation and self-realization is:

JOURNALING!

Of course.

I also realized that I have printed and used 8 different versions of the Daily Practice Journal as drafts to eventually publish.  As I sat and admired my beautiful journals I thought, “Why haven’t I ever moved on this project?”

And so I have decided that this is the project I am taking on as my first step out of hibernation and into creation.  I am so excited and already have filled 2 more pages in my journal with ideas, steps to take, and people to ask for support from.  I have given myself permission to focus on this project alone as I follow it through from start to finish.  Oh, I can’t wait to share it with you!  Stay tuned for more information on the project that has set my heart on fire!

While I was looking through my journals this morning for inspiration I found this beautiful passage and I simply must share it with you:

1/20/06
What exactly is fear?

Frightened
Excited (i.e. first date)
Avoiding
Risking

trying to stop us
letting us know we need to do some work, some preparation
holding us back
we do things with risks all the time (like driving and cooking) because we have learned how to avoid the danger [how to make them safe]

I am in awe of the synchronicity here because I kid you not, just a few days ago I was thinking about turning the word fear into an acronym and wondering what it would be.  And of course, all I had to do was look inside and there it was!

Stay tuned for some exciting news and an opportunity for you to help out…

Tags: connecting, courage, daily practice, fear, freedom, journaling, projects, Simply Fearless Daily Practice, writing

photo courtesy of Ford Driving Skills for Life

I received this from a friend and absolutely had to share it with you:

As parents of young drivers I though you may find this an interesting contrast.

The California method of stopping teenagers from texting while driving seems to be to make it illegal with a fairly mild penalty and then expect them to not do it.

The UK method is to continue a method of road safety advertising that has worked well for the last 15 years: Scare the crap out of them with TV adverts which if they didn’t count as public service broadcasts would never be allowed on TV.

Warning, it is very graphic. But then that’s the whole point:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8I54mlK0kVw

It certainly is disturbing and quite honestly, I teared up.  It does seem like a great way to show teens a dangerous consequence for something that seems like no big deal (texting while driving).  One thing to keep in mind is that the teenage brain is not yet mature.  The part of the brain that makes decisions based on long-term thinking versus immediate gratification isn’t mature yet.  So, parents be sure to have supportive structures (like turn your phone off before you start the car) in place in the meantime.

For those of you who dared to watch this video, what do you think about it? Do you think it’s an effective tool to deter teens from text driving?

Tags: driving, Family, fear, Parenting, teen

What a fun and fast read! Ever since I read the Twilight series I’ve been devouring all sorts of vampire books. I had no idea there were so many! This one was definitely catchy. Yeah, there were some parts that were kinda hokey, but the writing was sharp. I could see all the action clearly in my mind and I didn’t get the numerous characters confused.

Surprisingly enough there is some great advice in this book for parents of teens. Sometimes it’s easier to see into the life of a teen who isn’t your child. There’s less of an edge to it. I really liked this part when the main character talked about wanting her mom to simply wrap her arms around her and tell her it’s okay. As parents, we have a tendency to make it a lot harder than it is. The truth is a simple hug and a few words of encouragement go a long way.

One of my other favorite parts is when the leader of the vampyre high school told the fledglings who were going through the change to live their life to the absolute fullest as if today was their last (partly because they really could die at any time – sometimes their body rejected the change) because if they did die, then they would leave behind a great legacy and if they didn’t die, then they had already created a solid foundation for potentially centuries of greatness. How cool is that? What great advice!

Tags: advice, Book Reviews, books, Family, life purpose, Parenting, teen

Today I asked myself:

What is my heart asking me to do?

And here is the answer I received:

My heart is asking me to hibernate.  Don’t compare yourself to others.  Focus on nurturing yourself for now.  Non-action is heart action.  It’s only what you need for now.  It’s in the pause that you become open to receiving my wisdom.

As uncomfortable as this makes me, I know it is the right thing to do and today I let go of another layer of guilt.  I’m already on sabbatical and I give myself permission to relax through it.  It’s okay to stop trying and start allowing the answers to emerge.

So I’m curious…what is your heart asking you to do? or not do?!

p.s. Today on the Simply Fearless FB Fan Page I posted another awesome quote from my journal about beating yourself up. So if you are like me and find that self-criticism kicks in when you listen to your heart, then swing by and check it out.  Here’s the link.

Tags: advice, career, chihuahua, connecting, courage, happiness, heart, inspiration, Life Coaching