The Confidence of Conviction

Right after becoming a licensed minister, I met with a seasoned minister who counseled me about how to fund a new venture. After talking with her I was overwhelmed with the enormity of my endeavor. The reality and scope of my dream hit home and I began to judge myself as small, incapable, and unworthy of creating what I want to create. I was paralyzed by fear.

So I took it into spiritual practice. During meditation new ideas began to flow and I was guided back to the power of the creative process. I was reminded that the fear and overwhelm are not my reality. I was reminded that I’ve been given gifts, talents, skills, experiences, resources, and relationships to support my work, my ministry, and my dreams. In fact, my dreams are seeds planted within me by the Divine. The same power that planted it there is the same power that grows it.

As possibility began to grow in my mind, excitement began to grow in my heart. I was brought back to the delight and enthusiasm of creating something new. I reconnected with the Infinite Presence and Power of God that is always with me, within and all around, waiting and wanting to co-create with me. Trusting that there is nothing for me to do to prove myself worthy, I moved deeper into the receptivity of faith, taking note of the potential things I could do and people who might be able to help.

It’s not always easy to stay in the confidence of conviction. As I move forward, additional fears, worries, and concerns continue to come up. But, they do not have the power to stop me. Why? Because I am committed to rise up in faith. I will continue to show up for my dreams because they have shown up within me. There is a Divine Purpose planted within me and I am dedicated to nourishing it into life.

Now I’m curious. What is your dream? Are you willing to spend some time with it? You see, I believe the world needs each one of us to bring our dreams to life. Furthermore, your soul needs you to bring your dream into life. Your health, your heart, your joy, and your purpose not only enrich your life. They make a monumental difference in the lives of others. 

Journal prompts for you:

  • What is your dream?
  • What is one brave baby step you can take this week?
  • What support do you need?
  • Create an affirmation that will help you keep your focus on possibility, creativity, and fulfillment.

Would you like to connect with me in person about this topic? I’m giving a talk in British Columbia, Canada. Here are all the details:

The Power to Create with Rev Cassandra Rae
Sunday, November 11, 2018
Turnbull Room, Semiahmoo Arts Centre
Located at the South Surrey Recreation & Arts Centre
14601 20th Ave, South Surrey
Sunday Services from 10:30 am – 11:30 am (doors open at 10:00 am)

From Doubt to Possibility

I’m finding it quite challenging to write today. You see, I like to write from a place of clarity and confidence. But, quite frankly not much is clear or confident over here!

I’m in this in between space having finished ministerial training with the Centers for Spiritual Living and waiting to become licensed. I must pass oral panels, which are actually coming up in early August! (Side note: I plan on sharing the experience on Instagram if you want to come along for the journey.) This is the final step in becoming Reverend Cassandra Rae!

The thing is…my path isn’t exactly turning out the way I thought it would. I had this plan for how it would unfold and it’s not happening that way, which is okay…except I’m finding I’m much more attached to the initial plan than I thought I was. 

But, now that I’m writing, I’m realizing that the attachment isn’t really about everything going according to my previous plan. It’s about knowing how and when things will happen. I don’t like not knowing.

All of this is compounded by the fact that I’ve interviewed for a position at an organization and I’m waiting to find out if I got the job or not. Another level of not knowing {yet}.

From this vantage point, it seems as if my future is in other people’s hands and I’m just waiting to find out what’s going to happen. But…

I remember that my intention and my focus have power.

I remember that before new life bursts through the soil that it appears dark and scary.

I remember there are many, many things that are clear about what I want and what I’m passionate about.

I remember that the Universe is conspiring for my good.

I remember that Infinite Possibility is the nature of this Life.

So, I have some work to do. It’s time to get creative. It’s time to give myself some space and remember that while productivity might not look like how it normally looks in my life right now, but this in-between space is productive for the soul. I’m going to let that be enough. 

I’m going to spend some time visioning and visualizing. I’m going to get clear on what I want and why. Job or no job, I am responsible for creating my ministry, for cultivating the life I want to live.

And you know what? I’m excited about what’s to come! I might not know what it is {yet}. But, I know it will be good. 

UPDATE: I did not get the job I had applied for. While I am disappointed, I am also trusting that this is the best direction for my life and ministry.