Jan 21 2010
100 Things I Fear: insecurity, weakness, and overwhelm
64. {11/24/09} It’s easiest to explain today’s fear by sharing with you the dialogue from my journal. The statements in quotes are from my Soul and the statements without quotes are me:
Oh my god. Today I discovered that I’m one of those insecure business women devaluing herself and her services. Now I hate myself for it. What do I do?
“Well first of all. There’s no need to panic. You’re okay. This new information is going to help you. It’s here to help you.”
Oh okay. But, she’s so weak. I hate her for it.
“Yes there is a part of you that despises weakness. That’s why weakness is showing up for you: so that you can embrace that too. There is no other way around this but straight through it.”
Okay. My gut tells me I can no longer offer free stuff [in my coaching practice business].
“There’s some truth in there. And it’s not black and white. There’s no need to rush into action just yet. First, process the emotion and then move into motion.”
Oh okay. That makes sense. I can move into action when I have reconnected with my confidence and I’m not freaking out.
“Yes, it is wise not to move forward when you are freaking out.”
It also just occurred to me that believing in myself creates confidence.
“Yes, it does. This week is all about believing in you and discovering your beliefs. You are doing an excellent job.”
Thank you. It all just feels a bit overwhelming.
“Yes, it does. And you are strong enough to move through it with grace and dignity.”
Oh thank you. Sometimes it doesn’t feel that way.
“Yes, I know. I’m here to remind you.”
